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I'm glad you both have found a way to get past the incredible forces that are working against you. On the other hand, if you believe God is bigger than we can imagine, and is not constrained by religious dogma, you have as good a chance as any at a happy, thriving relationship. A good man is not defined by his religion and a great marriage is not defined by where it takes place. Well, the thing is he knows exactly how I feel and he has offered to give it all up. She's told me the church is one of the most important things to her, but from what I've researched already there's no way I would subject my future children to this culture. There will be sacrifices but I am hopeful. Cold approaches on Mormon girls are challenging. It just plain sucks. If you have children how will they be raised. I married someone that wasn't of my faith and it worked great.
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I was thinking about this last night after listening to Radio West. By all means, I encourage you to try having those discussions and to make a mental note of when you would choose to walk away instead. The decisions we have made in how to raise our kids have been our decisions alone.
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He is doing 2nd year Residency. Real love just happens. I am a lawyer married to a surgical oncologist. My life may not be as stressful as that of a medical resident or a doctor, but I do often spend upward of 70 - 80 hours per week working. If you stay together l, you are going to have to remind her of that commitment. She started crying when I explained this to her. It does kick your butt!. I love my former Mormon friends and family, but a relationship requires devotion and trust and understanding. But, if ever were there were a time to be overly cautious it's with this topic. If everything she is taught is correct and the Mormon church is "true" she should be able to research any anti-Mormon books or movies and prove their criticisms are lies.

But wait a minute. Be specific every time you ask. My kids have run as far away from medicine as possible in terms of a career and my daughter only dates people who have balance in their lives. The point is that there are way too many people talking in this thread as if they have some sort of psychic knowledge a stone in a hat, perhaps. I love him more than anyone else I've been with - but it takes a strong, patient woman willing to sacrifice a lot, to date a doctor. It's the extra socializing, hanging out with residents, stopping by the hospital to visit his best friend. Interestingly, my parents felt the same way about him. I love talking religion with him and I have never pressured him to change his habits or anything else about him. I found that it worked just as well. Also not one Nickel will be tithed out of any shared funds.

I decided to do the mormon thing and just not think about it too much right now. Don't try to fill the silence and rush to say something like "but I know you are super busy. This spotty attention from him makes me sure I want to end things sometime. I do think this girl is a keeper, and I'm more than willing to tolerate, be patient and live with the crazy schedule.



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